Jullys Souza Jr
Staff Writer
Salem, MA- Fitchburg State Men’s Soccer Tied the Salem State Vikings 2-2 on Saturday, September 21st. The match started slowly until the 14th minute when sophomore forward, Anthony Oliveira-Dalicandro scored his fourth collegiate goal. He had an assist by Elijah Kalombo. Some time went on throughout the half with great lockdown defense played by the Falcons keeping the lead 1-0, Falcons throughout the first half.
Into the Second half, the Falcons started strong with yet another goal by senior, Elijah Kalombo, giving the Falcons a 2-0 lead to the Vikings on their home turf. The Falcons were able to maintain their lead until the Vikings scored 10 minutes into the half. That was where Senior forward, Matheus Pelissari of Lowell, MA scored the Viking’s first goal of the game making it 2-1 starting their comeback of this match.
Just a few minutes after the first goal from the Vikings, they tied it up with a goal from Junior midfielder, Gabriel DaSilva. Now the Falcons and Vikings were neck and neck at 2-2. At this point, there were just under 30 minutes of playing time left, so it was anyone’s game. The rest of the match was a dogfight with lots of great defense from both the Falcons and Vikings, but unfortunately, no one came out as the victor. The match ended in a tie with a final score of 2-2.
It’s neither a win nor a loss, but it shows the potential of this year’s Fitchburg team and what kind of damage they could cause to other teams, this gives the school hope for the tough teams and matches that are coming up soon.
NOTES AND REVISIONS
In the future, incorporating quotes from players and coaches would greatly enhance the article by providing firsthand perspectives on key moments of the game. Interviews with players, such as Anthony Oliveira-Dalicandro or Elijah Kalombo, and the coach would add valuable insight and give the reader a deeper understanding of the team’s mindset and strategy. These quotes can humanize the story, making it more engaging and worthwhile for readers.
Headline Suggested: Falcons and Vikings Battle to a 2-2 Draw in Conference Opener
Reasoning: This title highlights the competitive nature of the match and the final outcome.
Lead
Current: Fitchburg State Men’s Soccer took a trip over to Salem, MA where they faced off with the Salem State Vikings for their first conference match this year. The game ended with a tie of 2-2.
Suggested: The Fitchburg State men’s soccer team opened their conference schedule with a hard-fought 2-2 draw against Salem State University on Saturday. Despite taking an early lead, the Falcons were forced to settle for a tie after a strong second-half comeback by the Vikings.
Reasoning: The lead should summarize the outcome and the key events of the match, providing a clear overview right away.
Body
Clarify First Half Action
Current: “The match started a little slow, until the 14th minute when sophomore Anthony Oliveira-Dalicandro scored his fourth collegiate goal. Some time went on with good defense played by the Falcons and good offense keeping the score 1-0 Falcons throughout the first half.” Suggested: The game began quietly until the 14th minute when sophomore Anthony Oliveira-Dalicandro netted his fourth collegiate goal to give the Falcons a 1-0 lead. Fitchburg’s defense held firm for the remainder of the first half, keeping Salem State’s offense at bay.
Reasoning: This makes the narrative clearer and more concise while eliminating vague phrases like “some time went on.”
Enhance Second Half Descriptions
Current: “Into the second half, the Falcons started strong with another goal in under a minute by Senior, Elijah Kalombo, giving the Falcons a 2-0 lead to the Vikings on their home turf.” Suggested: Fitchburg State came out strong in the second half, with senior Elijah Kalombo scoring just 30 seconds in to double the Falcons’ lead to 2-0.
Reasoning: The sentence is shortened for better readability, and the timing of the goal is clarified.
Narrative of the Vikings’ Comeback
Current: “A good pace of play kept the Vikings from scoring until 10 minutes into the half. That was where Matheus Pelissari of Lowell, MA scored the Viking’s first goal of the game making it 2-1 starting their comeback of this match.” Suggested: The Falcons maintained control until the 55th minute, when Matheus Pelissari of Salem State broke through with a goal, cutting the lead to 2-1 and sparking the Vikings’ comeback.
Reasoning: This refines the timeline and narrative flow, giving the moment more weight.
Highlight Key Moments
Current: “Just a few minutes after the first goal from the Vikings, another was scored by Gabriel DaSilva. Now the Falcons and Vikings were neck and neck at 2-2.” Suggested: Just minutes after Pelissari’s goal, Gabriel DaSilva found the back of the net, leveling the score at 2-2 and shifting the momentum in favor of the Vikings.
Reasoning: This makes the comeback feel more dramatic and adds energy to the moment.
Conclusion
Current: “It’s neither a win nor a loss, but it shows the potential of this team and what kind of damage they could cause to other teams, this gives the school hope for good matches that are coming up soon.”
Suggested: While the draw wasn’t the result the Falcons hoped for, their performance showed significant promise. With two goals and strong defensive play, Fitchburg State demonstrated the potential to challenge future opponents. The Falcons return to action on Tuesday, September 24th, when they host the University of New England at Elliot Field.
Reasoning: The conclusion should reflect the balance between acknowledging the draw and looking ahead to future matches. It should avoid informal language and provide a professional wrap-up.
Notes:
Tone: Keep the tone neutral and professional, focusing on the facts and the team’s performance.
Flow: Ensure a smooth transition between key events, particularly between the first and second half.
Details: Incorporate precise moments, like times of goals and players’ full names, to add credibility.
