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The Point

The Student News Site of Fitchburg State University

The Point

The Student News Site of Fitchburg State University

The Point

    Crazy/Weird Laws in Massachusetts (That You Probably Didn't Know About)

    Written By: Nate Thomas
    Sometimes a law is made that might make sense at the time, but as time passes these laws make less sense and seem a little crazy/weird.
    By breaking some of these laws, someone could technically earn jail time and/or receive a huge fine. Here are some of those laws that still exist in the Commonwealth of Massachusetts. (I saved my favorite for last)
    *By reading the list below, you enter a contractual agreement with me, Nate Thomas, that you will share this article if you have broken any of these laws.*
     

    1. Writing Someone Else’s Essay is Illegal

    Essay
    PUT THAT PEN DOWN! (And stop biting your fingernails)

    That’s right students if you write someone else’s essay…SHIT…GOES…DOWN. One would think you would just get in trouble with your school, but not so much. You can be hit with a $100 fine and/or 6 months in jail, just because your roommate was in over his head and you wanted to make a quick $20. I’M LOOKING AT YOU WRITING MAJORS. (Source)
     

    1. Talking In A Library is Illegal

    Librarian Shushing
    Margaret telling you to shush.

    Hey! Margaret told you to shush. So shush! Oh, you’ve done it now! You are going to be thrown in jail for a month or have to pay a fine of $50. That is the punishment for talking in a library or interrupting the people in it in any way. (Source)
     

    1. You May Be Living in a Haunted House

    Ghost
    What? Haunted? Pfft! Noooooo!

    So this seems a little messed up. It turns out, that if someone has died in a house, you are trying to buy, a realtor/real estate agent is not legally obligated to tell you, and neither is the state. Thankfully, you can check to see if someone has died in your house at DiedInHouse.com. Search at your own risk. (Source)
     

    1. Prank Calling is a Bad Call

    Prank Calls
    No…YOU hang up first…

    So this is more geared towards your younger siblings (hopefully). It just so happens, that when you ask someone if their fridge is running, you better be the one who is running. If you make a prank call, you can be hit with a $500 fine. (Source)
     

    1. Pre-Marital Sex is Illegal

    Coach Carr
    Wise words from a wise man

    “Don’t have sex, because you will get pregnant and you will die!” On top of that, you then owe Massachusetts a $30 fine or 3 months in jail. (Source) “Don’t have sex in missionary position, don’t have sex standing up, just don’t do it, okay, promise? Okay, now everybody take some rubbers.”
     

    1. Cursing at Fenway and Foxborough is Illegal…Unless You Are Under 16

    Cursing Brady
    Oops…another fine for Brady

    In the state of Massachusetts, once you hit the ripe old age of 16, it becomes illegal for you to curse at a sporting event. Any sporting event for any reason. If you curse, you are going to be fined $50. I think a lot of New England fans owe this state A LOT of money. (Source)
     

    1. Christmas is Illegal

     

    The Grinch
    He is staring into my soul…

     
    The 1600’s were a weird time for Massachusetts. Puritans took over the settlement, and across the pond, they beheaded King Charles I. The first thing they decided to do with their new power was to ban Christmas. Instead, December 25th became a day where men could think about their sins of the year and feel humiliated. The fine for celebrating Christmas? 5 Schillings. Good luck finding Schillings in America in 2016. (Source)
     
    Now it is time for my favorite one.

    1. Blasphemy is Illegal

     

    Easter Cookies
    Easter Cookies…Too Soon?

     
    The act of insulting The Father, Son, and/or the Holy Ghost, cursing in their names, or ridiculing the Bible, are all illegal acts that carry pretty severe punishments. For committing any one of these acts, you can be fined $300, put on a form of probation, or be thrown in jail for one year. (Source) This one is my favorite because I am an Atheist, which means I owe A LOT of jail time. Let’s hope no cops are reading this. We don’t need to act on the warrant for my arrest that is no doubt in the system.
    So that’s the list. Compiled by just looking through the official government laws and looking for things that could potentially be ridiculous.
    So what were your favorite laws? Let us know in the comments below!

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    • C

      Chris HansenNov 11, 2017 at 7:34 pm

      The first one has a name, Plagiarism. Selling people haunted houses accounts for over half of the horror movie genre, and a law 400 years ago is not technically a law now. I’ve never heard of blaspheme as a crime, this country is actually going through a time when religion is taboo in commercialism and it’s creating a stigma behind the nation theming one particular following. I suppose you needed to complete your assignment at Fitchburg though.

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